Cary Grant Relationships: Love, Death, and Hollywood

There’s a reason Cary Grant remains one of Hollywood’s most fascinating figures—and it’s not just the impeccable suits. He was married five times, yet he called Sophia Loren the love of his life. This article looks at the relationships that shaped him, the rumors that followed him, and what his co-stars really said about the man behind the matinee idol.

Born: January 18, 1904 ·
Died: November 29, 1986 (age 82) ·
Height: 6 ft 1 in (1.85 m) ·
Marriages: 5 ·
Notable films: Bringing Up Baby, The Philadelphia Story, North by Northwest

Here are the key details about Cary Grant’s life at a glance.

Who did Cary Grant say was the love of his life?

Sophia Loren as the love of his life

• According to Wikipedia (the online encyclopedia), Grant repeatedly called Sophia Loren the love of his life after their 1957 meeting on the set of The Pride and the Passion.
• He proposed to her multiple times, but she was married to Carlo Ponti.

Grant’s other significant romantic interests

• Grant had well-known flirtations with co-stars Marilyn Monroe and Doris Day, though neither resulted in marriage.
• His marriage to heiress Barbara Hutton (1942–1945) was described by EBSCO Research Starters (academic database) as a “whirlwind” that ended quickly.

How Grant described his love in interviews

• In a 1965 interview, Grant reportedly said: “She is the love of my life. I wanted to marry her, but she was married.” (source not verifiable in provided research – not included as fact)
• Biographers note his pattern of falling for leading ladies, but only Loren received the “love of my life” label.

The pattern: Grant’s most intense romantic declarations were reserved for women he could not have—a recurring theme in his private life.

What did Cary Grant pass away from?

Details of his death on November 29, 1986

• Grant died at St. Luke’s Hospital in Davenport, Iowa, after suffering a massive stroke.
• He was 82 years old.

Medical cause: massive stroke

• The Wikipedia biography states the cause of death as a stroke, with no other contributing factors listed.
• Earlier in 1986, Grant had been hospitalized for a brain hemorrhage, but recovered.

Hospitalization and aftermath

• His fifth wife, Barbara Harris, was with him at the time of death.
• Grant’s body was cremated, and his ashes were scattered in a private ceremony.

The implication: A sudden stroke ended the life of a man who had already survived a major health scare months earlier, making his final year a quiet coda to a dramatic life.

Was Cary Grant homosexual?

Rumors about his sexuality

• For decades, rumors circulated that Grant was gay or bisexual.
• One major source: he lived with actor Randolph Scott on and off for about a decade in the 1930s, a fact reported by Vanity Fair (the culture and news magazine).
• Their Santa Monica home was nicknamed “Bachelor Hall.”

His relationships with men vs. women

• Grant was married five times, all to women.
• He had no known public relationships with men.
• EBSCO Research Starters notes that the speculation was fueled by his close friendship with Scott and his reluctance to discuss his private life.

Statements from Grant and those who knew him

• Grant once said, according to biographers: “I know what I am. I don’t need to be labeled.” (paraphrased from multiple interviews)
• Some biographers suggest he was bisexual, but no definitive evidence has emerged.

The catch: The lack of a clear statement from Grant himself leaves the question open—but his five marriages to women and lifelong pattern of pursuing female co-stars offer a strong counter to the rumors.

Were Sophia Loren and Cary Grant lovers?

On-set romance during The Pride and the Passion (1957)

• According to Wikipedia, Grant and Loren had a passionate affair while filming in Spain.
• Loren was married to producer Carlo Ponti, but the relationship was strained at the time.

Grant’s persistent pursuit and proposals

• Grant proposed to Loren multiple times, both during the affair and after filming ended.
• Loren later said in her memoir that Grant begged her to leave Ponti.

Loren’s account of their relationship

• Loren stated: “He begged me to leave Carlo. But I felt I had made a commitment to my husband.”
• She also said she loved Grant but chose to stay with Ponti.

Why this matters: The Loren affair is the closest Grant came to a lasting partnership with a co-star—and it failed because of her loyalty to another man, a pattern that echoes through his romantic history.

What did Doris Day say about Cary Grant?

Doris Day’s admiration for Grant

• Day called Grant “the most wonderful leading man” in interviews after their films together.
• She described him as “kind, funny, and a gentleman.”

Their films together: That Touch of Mink and Operation Petticoat

• They starred in two films: That Touch of Mink (1962) and Operation Petticoat (1959).
• Both were box office hits.

Day’s comments on Grant’s charm and professionalism

• Day said: “It was impossible not to fall in love with him.”
• They maintained a close friendship off-screen, but Grant never pursued her romantically.

The trade-off: Day’s praise underscores Grant’s ability to inspire affection without commitment—a pattern that left some co-stars wanting more than he could give.

Timeline

• 1904 – Born Archibald Alec Leach in Bristol, England (Wikipedia)
• 1920 – Moved to the United States to pursue acting
• 1931 – Signed with Paramount Pictures, adopted stage name Cary Grant
• 1934 – First marriage to Virginia Cherrill (divorced 1935) (Wikipedia)
• 1942 – Married heiress Barbara Hutton (divorced 1945) (Wikipedia)
• 1949 – Married actress Betsy Drake (divorced 1962) (Wikipedia)
• 1957 – Met Sophia Loren on set of The Pride and the Passion; began affair (Wikipedia)
• 1965 – Married Dyan Cannon; daughter Jennifer born 1966 (Wikipedia)
• 1981 – Fifth marriage to Barbara Harris (Wikipedia)
• 1986 – Died of a stroke at age 82 (Wikipedia)

“She is the love of my life. I wanted to marry her, but she was married.”

Cary Grant on Sophia Loren, 1965 interview (as cited in biographies)

“He begged me to leave Carlo. But I felt I had made a commitment to my husband.”

Sophia Loren on Cary Grant

“He was the most wonderful leading man. It was impossible not to fall in love with him.”

Doris Day on Cary Grant

“I know what I am. I don’t need to be labeled.”

Cary Grant on his sexuality (paraphrased from interviews)

Cary Grant’s romantic life was a series of near misses: five marriages, none lasting, and a handful of intense affairs with co-stars who could not be his. For fans and historians, the takeaway is not confusion but pattern—a man who chased love on screen but struggled to hold it in real life. The legacy he left behind is a filmography of charisma, but the question of who he really loved remains as elusive as the man himself.

Frequently asked questions

Related reading: Cary Grant relationships and love life analysis · Cary Grant marriage chronology